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 The Price of Redemption (18+)

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SoldierG65434-2
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PolarisAmane
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PostSubject: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun May 23, 2010 10:47 am

Guess I should have a place to post my up-dates. When I can be arsed I guess I'll write a proper synopsis or something...

Just posted the new chapter for The Price of Redemption

It's My Own Cheating Heart That Makes Me Cry

Got to give a warning for the angst on this one - enjoy!
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun May 23, 2010 10:51 am

Great chapter Polaris.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun May 23, 2010 11:17 am

Am I wrong if I didn't find that chapter really all that angsty?
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun May 23, 2010 12:25 pm

No, it kind of wasn't as angsty as I expected.

Soifon was just downright cold. It's not entirely uncalled for given how much Yoruichi had already hurt her, but I do feel bad for Yoruichi.

I wonder what Yoruichi is going to do.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun May 23, 2010 9:30 pm

Very good chapter and I appreciate the lack of angst in it. There was some but for the most part it was all just anger, which is something that happens a lot in situations like what Yoruichi and Soi find themselves in, but is never really portrayed in fanfiction even though you see the cheating partner quite often. Anyways, I very much look forward to the next chapter. Don't leave us hanging too long!
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 3:27 pm

Well, I did say that I would get it finished by sunday and since I've not got a hangover at all, I managed to get loads of work done.

In Trust of No One II

I had a ridiculous amount of fun with this chapter.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 5:11 pm

And the plot seems even thicker. Hm
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 5:15 pm

And so much more convoluted. Hopefully not too messy though.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 5:19 pm

So much is revolving around Yoruichi and she doesn't even know it.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 6:48 pm

Just more questions, still nothing answered when it comes to your secondary storyline(I consider the YoruSoi relationship the main one). Hopefully we'll get some answers in the next chapter. Don't keep us waiting to long please!
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Jun 13, 2010 7:03 pm

Least this chapter actually had some focus on the secondary storyline. And the next few chapters will be solely about that, and will hopefully answer some questions.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Oct 10, 2010 5:09 pm

Holy crap I've actually updated!

Here's chapter 32, Half-Empty Bottle for your reading... pleasure?
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Oct 10, 2010 8:33 pm

Perfect timing. I had just got caught up a couple weeks ago.

This chapter did help to explain some things and I'm kind of glad that you're focusing on some of the secondary storylines. Not to say I won't being excited when the YoruSoi starts up again. But good job. It was a very nice chapter.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptyTue Oct 12, 2010 1:43 pm

I read the chapter. ^_^

I love what you did with Rangiku and Hitsugaya, there. Giving Rangiku enough intelligence to write a note in code, and having Hitsugaya be the one to figure it out. It pleases the HitsuMatsu shipper in me. Even though I'm sure that's not what you were going for. XD
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptyTue Oct 12, 2010 5:25 pm

Haha, it wasn't what I was going for, but I'm glad that you enjoyed it nonetheless.

A little bit of me thinks that Rangiku is a secret genius, so it sorta made sense in my head that she'd be able to quickly leave a note with a clue as to what happened to her. I'd hate it if she did turn to be as dumb as she often comes across in the manga/anime.

Thanks guys for reading and for the comments. Tis much appreciated.

12/30/2010
Anyways, I have finally updated Redemption. Just so you all know, at this precise moment I hate this chapter more than I hate Harribel. This feeling will probably subside later and I'll no doubt like the chapter sometime next week.

Start Swimming

It's roughly 10,500 words long... do I win some sort of prize for writing consistently long and mostly drivel laden chapters?
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySat Jan 01, 2011 12:26 am

(I went ahead and merged your two posts. Hope you weren't to attached to the phrase "Hurray double post!!")

Good stuff, as usual. I was glad to see you managed to make it through the chapter without doing something like this to Harrible.

On another note; I found myself unreasonably angry at blekmedelninjan for the review (s)he left you. Specifically the phrase "...despite this being a fic meant to focues on YoruSoi..." It made me fume for a few minutes for a multitude of reasons.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySat Jan 01, 2011 12:40 am

Nice chapter! I really liked the way you wrote Harribel as well.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySat Jan 01, 2011 6:33 am

SoldierG65434-2 wrote:
On another note; I found myself unreasonably angry at blekmedelninjan for the review (s)he left you. Specifically the phrase "...despite this being a fic meant to focues on YoruSoi..." It made me fume for a few minutes for a multitude of reasons.

i always read the reviews before i read a fic, so i have yet to read the latest update. i will do as soon as i can. anyway, the review that made me a little irritated is libello's, with his: "You cannot possibly hate Harribel! That is outright blasphemy, really. How dare you, my good sir? I would come and slap you with a glove to initiate a duel with you, if not for the fact that I have no idea where you live - but still!"

...i have a feeling every review amused polaris, and us getting irritated at them only amuses her more.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySat Jan 01, 2011 7:26 am

Yeah... I am amused...

And speaking of my being amused, here's my choice typo for this chapter:

Quote :
Harribel's eyes widened a fraction and she stepped quickly to the side. She felt a whip of air against her head as a fish narrowly missed her.

A fish? Holy shit, what's that doing there?

2/1/20011
Treading Water

you know when you have an idea and in your head it sounds really good, and then when you try it out it just doesn't work at all llike how you imagined it?

That's how I feel about this chapter. Oh well - looking forward to the next one since I get to kill someone off.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptyTue Feb 01, 2011 1:14 pm

Quote :
She just wasn't willing to risk her arm to escape

I disagree. She would have been totally willing to sacrifice her arm to escape. Because in Bleach, arms are expendable. Fuck, if you have enough, you can even summon a horrible hell-beast.

Good stuff, as always. I'm fairly certain I already know who's going to eat it, so all that's left is to find out how. Here's hoping it's Colonel Mustard in the dining room with the wrench.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Mar 06, 2011 8:35 pm

Two days and 12,000 words - I am a writing machine! or just incredibly sad, take your pick...

Drowning

I didn't expect to get this chapter finished so soon, but I'm glad that I did. I had fun wiht this chapter, but it's going to be nice to get back to all the YoruSui stuff.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptySun Mar 06, 2011 9:43 pm

It was an awesome chapter. You write the characters so well! ^_^

I really hate Kisuke, on a side note.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptyMon Mar 07, 2011 3:52 am

Oh, poor Kisuke...

But yeah, I really played on his creepy sinister side for this and he's a bit of a bastard. Oddly, this makes him all the more appealing to me, both in a character sense and also in an attractive sense. Weird.

And I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.
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PostSubject: Re: The Price of Redemption (18+)   The Price of Redemption (18+) EmptyMon Mar 07, 2011 4:00 am

PolarisAmane wrote:
Oddly, this makes him all the more appealing to me, both in a character sense and also in an attractive sense. Weird.
I tend to be in the same camp as you (save for the attractiveness thing). Sinister and conniving Urahara is really the only Urahara I can stomach in serious works, mostly because it addresses a lot of the structural issues that I have with him as a character. For the most part, he feels cobbled together to me, constantly getting more past and abilities as is dictated by the circumstances of the manga, rather than by any organic history (Yoruichi suffers from this too, but to a much lesser extent but the virtue of her being exponentially less important).

Him being manipulative and "hiding" (in terms of the manga, you can't hide what wasn't happening) such important things about what he's doing and who he is gives him much needed cohesiveness and direction as a character, rather than him just being a patchwork created by a manga that's rapidly spiraled out of control.
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